Paleo and Gluten-Free tortillas

Paleo & Gluten-Free Tortillas

Ingredients

2 eggs whisked
1 cup of full fat coconut milk (or you can use unsweetened almond milk)
1 tbs of olive oil
3/4 cup of tapioca flour
3 tbs of coconut flour
1/4 tsp sea salt

Instructions

In a mixing bowl, combine all the above wet ingredients (including the tablespoon of oil)
In a separate bowl, combine all dry ingredients together (salt and flours)
Pour wet ingredients into dry ingredients bowl and whisk until fully combined
Season your pan with olive oil (we used a 10" non-stick pan)
Heat pan on medium to medium-low heat
Pour 1/3 cup of batter into center of pan to form about a 6" circle
Cook for 2-3 minutes until tortilla is lightly browned on the bottom
Flip and cook about 1 to 1 1/2 minutes on the opposite side until browned
Place tortillas on a paper towel-lined plate
Makes about 6 tortillas about 6-inches in diameter

Hash Brown Potato Cakes

Hash Brown Potato Cakes

Ingredients

1 pound russet or round red potatoes
1/2 of a medium onion, very thinly sliced
1 tablespoon olive oil
2 teaspoons snipped fresh thyme or 1/4 teaspoon dried thyme, crushed
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper
Nonstick cooking spray

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 300 degrees F. Peel and coarsely shred potatoes; immediately rinse with cold water in a colander. Drain well, pressing lightly, then pat dry with paper towels; place in a large bowl. Quarter the onion slices. Stir onion, oil, thyme, salt, and pepper into potatoes.

2. Lightly coat an unheated very large nonstick skillet or griddle with nonstick cooking spray. Preheat skillet or griddle over medium heat. For each cake, scoop a slightly rounded measuring tablespoon of the potato mixture onto skillet or griddle. Press down potato mixture with a spatula to flatten evenly. Cook for 5 minutes. Using a wide spatula, carefully turn potato cakes (be sure not to turn cakes too soon or they will not hold together). Cook for 3 to 5 minutes more or until golden brown. Place cooked potato cakes on a baking sheet. Keep warm, uncovered, in oven while cooking remaining potato cakes. Repeat with remaining potato mixture, stirring mixture frequently. Makes 8 servings (16 potato cakes).

Nutrition Facts Per Serving:

Servings Per Recipe: 8

PER SERVING: 59 cal., 2 g total fat 75 mg sodium, 9 g carb. (1 g fiber), 1 g pro.

One week

I'm a week out from this whole wedding thing I'm in.  Oh.  I'm the bride.  Right.  So yeah, a week from right now I'll be someone's wife.  Wife.  Hmm.  You know, people keep asking me if I'm getting nervous.  I thought I would be, but I'm not.  I'm not nervous to marry Charles at all.  I'm excited.  But I can't tell you if I'm more excited about the wedding itself, or excited for it to be over so I can have my life back.  We regularly are out until after 10:00 due to wedding stuff.  I'm tired.  I want to be able to come home and veg out on the couch at night, and not worry about stuff I need to do.  I'd like to spend more time with my dog, who, although he's a good sport about it, is being somewhat neglected in the attention department lately.

I'm also excited to get my room back.  My room - the office.  This is where my massive Nascar collection lives. It's also where the evil elliptical lives.  That one that wants to kill me, and has tried.  I didn't get to finish the room because it started being taken over by wedding stuff.  I want to finish that room.  I'd like to get back on the elliptical and show it who's boss, while watching Northern Exposure on DVD.  I also want to play with all the new toys I've received as wedding gifts, which are all in boxes in the office.  Lots of kitchen appliances that will be all sorts of fun to experiment with.

I really have nothing profound to say, but noticed I hadn't updated this in a while.  Too busy.  Too tired. And my life is being consumed by the wedding, and I'm absolutely certain no one wants to read every detail about wedding planning.  So.  That's all I've got.

A blog not about weddings

I'm going to attempt to create a blog post that does not go into inane wedding details that certainly no one cares about.  Here we go...

I've noticed on a few blogs recently that people are typing out interesting or funny conversations they have with their significant other. Charles and I have funny conversations from time to time too.  Like the other day.  I had consumed far too much sugar and caffeine that day (THANK YOU MCDONALD'S SWEET TEA), and right around bedtime, the shenanigans really began.  I told Charles I was going to move out if he didn't stop doing something.  Or if he didn't do something.  I can't remember why I made this threat, but rest assured, it was funny.

He tried to tell me he was fine with me moving out, and wanted to know where I was going to go.  Yes, everyone who is fine with someone else moving out wants to know where the moving party is going.  At any rate, I told him I was going to my mother's house.

Charles:  If you go to your mother's house, will I grow a scraggly beard?

Me:  Most definitely.  Then you'll start picking up stray animals.  And you'll name them all Holly, so you can continue to say my name in the house.  Because you'll miss me.

Charles:  Really?  All Holly?

Me:  All except one.  One you will name Baby.  So you can still call something Baby.

Charles:  Interesting.

I promise this conversation was funny when we had it.  Or, my sugar and caffeine induced state caused that to be funny.  That's also highly possible.

We had a dance lesson tonight.  We are learning how to ballroom dance, for that event we are part of in April (see what I did there?).  The dance instructor, for some reason, got the first impression that Charles is a quiet, low key guy.  If there is a part of Charles that is low key and quiet, I've never seen it.  Ever.  And I've been around for over 3 years now.  I think by now I'd have seen it.  At any rate, we had a good time dancing, and Charles actually surprised me with his ability not to totally screw up the dance, and his ability not to stomp on my feet.  Apparently, I will not be screaming "STOP STEPPING ON MY FEET YOU CLUMSY BASTARD" during previously referred to event.  That's probably a good thing.  I'm not sure adding that line will do anything for "Just a Kiss."  We get our second lesson on Monday night, and I'm kinda excited about it.  It really was fun.  We are considering continuing the lessons, after the free ones run out on Monday, depending on the cost.  It'll be good for Charles and I to have something that is ours, that we do together on a consistent basis.  Right now, we consistently sit in the living room, on our respective computers, and he tries to talk to me while I ignore him for The Knot.  Not nice, Holly.

Working out - I wish I had more ability to make myself do it.  We've been eating healthy since January, and Charles has lost weight.  I have not.  This makes me an angry person, and it drives me to bad foods.  It's a nasty cycle.  Oh, and for some of the workouts I've done, I have figured this out:  I hate Jillian Michaels.  That bitch is crazy.  She makes me hurt.  Bad.  I know it's supposedly a good hurt, but what could possibly be good about being sore for 4 days after one workout?  My sister said if I had continued to work out while sore, I wouldn't have been so sore for so long.  Great, sister.  If I had worked out while I was that sore, I'd still be in a crumpled heap on the floor, cussing at anyone and anything that touched me.  Okay, okay.  I will try to be nicer to Jillian the rest of the week.  My pants are much tighter than they should be, and that has to stop.  Jillian and I will be friends soon.  I hope.  But she has to stop hurting me first.

Oh wedding....

I'm tired of planning a wedding.  Really tired.  I don't want to wedding plan anymore.  It's amazing how often I'm asked "So how's the wedding planning going?"  I never know how to answer that question.  Do they really want to know what I've managed to accomplish, which is a much shorter list than what I have left to accomplish?  I could just tell them "I haven't done shit on the wedding.  I'm pretty sure that if I wait long enough, the wedding fairies will show up and do it all for me. I'm waiting for them before I even consider doing anything."  


I also think other people care about this more than I do.  Or, at least they care more about the details than I do.  My sister took a bunch of ribbon away from me this past weekend, because it wasn't the right shade of blue.  Apparently, my wedding color is not navy, so I'm supposed to just get over it.  I don't care.  No one will notice if I use navy ribbon against electric blue bridesmaids dresses.  Besides which, it's not like I'm asking my bridesmaids to wear a navy sash with electric blue dresses.  No.  This ribbon would be fine for favor boxes.  Or centerpieces.  Or the bubbles.  Or anything, really.  If the guests at my wedding are noticing that the ribbon is the wrong color, then I've failed.  Not in that the ribbon is the wrong color, but that my guests are bored enough to be noticing color differences.  If I entertain my guests properly, no one will have time to worry about that damn navy blue ribbon tied to the top of their bubbles.


This weekend is full of wedding stuff.  Cake and flowers, mostly.  Then Sunday there's a bridal expo we're going to.  I made a list of what we have left to do, and it's frustrating me more than anything.  I know I haven't done that much, but it sure seems like I have an awful lot to do, and not much time left.  And February is a short month.  Great.  

Cooking for idiots

I've started to really enjoy cooking.  Like, really enjoy it.  I love prepping food, and I love trying new things.  Well, new recipes with new things slowly introduced to my palate.  In the last year, I feel like I've really developed my palate to the point where I'm not longer eating like a toddler.  Why is this?  Two words:  Food Network.  I love the show Chopped.  It's so fascinating to watch people take 4 random ingredients, things that should not go together, and often things I've never heard of, and actually make the ingredients work together.  Granted, the food may not taste very good to me, but the judges more often than not seem to like it. 

Which brings me to my next thought.  I want to go to culinary school.  I'm not aiming to be a kick ass, world famous chef; no, instead, I just want to learn basic technique, and learn how all these flavors go together.  Also, I've heard that when you cook stuff in culinary school, you have to eat it.  I think this would be another way to introduce myself to new flavors and new foods. 

My spice cabinet is looking pretty awesome these days.  My spice cabinet literally used to consist of black pepper, salt, garlic salt, garlic pepper, and garlic powder (are we seeing a theme here?).  Now, it's got all kinds of goodies in it, and I know how to use them.  Thank you random recipes I find.  These recipes have forced me to buy cumin (which, I've had to buy more as I actually ran out recently), coriander, ground oregano, cilantro, and lots of other things.  My spice cabinet is overflowing with yummy goodness.  I really need a spice rack.  I registered for one.  I love the reaction I get to that, too.  "What are you going to do with all those spices?  You know you can't use more than half of them, because they are weird."  I don't know how weird they are, but I'm willing to bet I can find a use for many of them. 

My fiance is loving my new adventurousness into cooking; of course he is.  He gets to eat all the yums that I make/create/destroy.  I did destroy a recipe yesterday.  Literally.  I'm sure there's nothing wrong with the recipe, when it's followed.  But, I don't follow recipes well.  I see things on the list that I can't find or I'm not willing to eat, and I substitute things.  This is not where the plan went awry.  It went awry because I may not have been paying attention when I was adding salt.  I'm imagining that the food tasted much like a cow's salt lick.  I've never had a salt lick, but that's what I'm guessing, anyway.  I'll have to try the recipe again at another time, this time with a lot less salt. 

My fiance also thinks I should bake more.  When you bake, the recipe is important.  It's not a guideline, most often.  It's a rule.  I hate rules.  And that whole I don't follow recipes well kinda screws up baking for me.  If I can't play with the recipe, I don't want to make it.  Plus, I don't eat a lot of sweet stuff anyway, and I certainly don't need it around the house as temptation.  Seriously working on losing this back injury/steroid/general laziness weight, and having cakes, cookies, and cupcakes around the house are likely to be counterproductive to this goal.  I'll stick to my dinner recipes for now. 

Which leads me to my next thought.  I want new pots and pans, and better knives.  And, I want to learn how to properly sharpen knives.  I'm sure I could look that technique up on Youtube, but I'm also certain that I'm not smart enough to mimic that technique without causing major injury to myself.  I also want a gas stove in the house we eventually buy.  I'm not a fan of electric stoves, really.  I'm not sure why they are a staple of houses.  All stoves should be gas.  Gas is much easier to control, I think.  When it's off, it's off.  It's a quicker temperature adjustment too.  Plus, it's a freaking fire.  I can't light candles on an electric stove eye; I can on a gas stove.  Not that I spend a lot of time lighting candles with the stove.  I couldn't, anyway.  It's electric.  I'm just saying, it would be awesome if I could. 

Neglectful Blogger

Somehow, I figured this is how this blog would end up - neglected.  I have lots of thoughts, lots of randomness.  I just rarely have the motivation to organize those thoughts and all that randomness into something coherent enough for someone else to read.  Or, for that matter, for me to go back and read months later when I remember I have a blog. 

Also, I tend to have these long, drawn out thoughts in my head when I'm no where near my computer to blog.  That's an issue too.  For instance, my mind likes to wander when I drive.  I cannot even begin to tell you how many times I've decided, okay, I want to listen to this whole song.  Let's listen to the lyrics and find out what this song is all about.  By the time I remember I was listening to the lyrics of the song, the song is well over, and I've arrived at my destination.  I'll do this with a particular song for weeks before I actually hear the lyrics of the song. 

And away went the thoughts again.  I can't always control them.  The issue here, though, is that now my thoughts can come out of my fingers, onto a blog, and into your, the reader's, brain.  For that, I'm truly sorry.  No one should be asked to keep up with my racing mind.  Why people choose to do it, I don't know.  My fiance, for example.  For some reason, he'll sit and listen to me ramble about all kinds of things.  My sister is another one of those people that'll sit and listen to me say weird stuff.  I wish I could come up with something at the moment, but of course, when put on the spot, an illogical explanation of a simple task will not come.  Well, I do have one in mind that I had with my fiance the other day, but it's really sort of gross, so I'll spare you the details.  Suffice it to say I took a really normal activity and found an odd way to explain it. 

So, back to reality with me.  I have to get in a wedding dress in a little less than 4 months.  And wear it ALL DAY.  I have a dress; it's in my dad's closet.  It fit me when we bought it - in August.  I'm not sure it will now.  Thank you, back injury and steroid treatments.  I've definitely gained weight since we bought the dress.  I have a fitting in about 2 weeks, and it'll be interesting to see how it fits my somewhat larger body now.  I'm not happy with my weight at the moment, so I'm working on it.   Well, half-assed working on it, anyway.  I've met a new website, www.skinnytaste.com.  The recipes here are low fat and low calorie, but very, very good.  Even my fiance likes them, and he was really leery when I told him it was time to take control of how much crap we are putting in our bodies.  I figure, though, low calorie won't be so hard if I actually like what I'm eating.  Tonight, for instance, I had cuban pork that I made in the crock pot.  It was freaking amazing; bonus points for it being low calorie. 

I need to get back on that evil elliptical.  I'm still certain it wants to kill me.  Since putting a tv and dvd player in the office with the elliptical, I've been on the elliptical a grand total of once.  I was really hoping the tv would distract me from the pain the elliptical was inflicting on my body.  Not so.  I'm not sure anything could distract me from that.  I've got to find a work out routine that I actually enjoy.   We have a dancing game for the Kinect, but I haven't tried it yet.  Clearly, I'm going to lose lots of weight by watching the game sit on the shelf.  So far, all I've lost is another spot to dust.